Elder Morris speaks on Passion

Somehow, even through letters from across the country, my missionary always knows the PERFECT things to say to his girl.

(excerpt from letter on October 14, 2008)

"... Massive props on the perfect card pick out!  What do you wish for at 11:11?  I wish for you to have more happiness.  You sound way depressed.  I hate the idea of my shorty feeling unpassionate!!  I would not date someone who is bland.  You are not a bland person and refuse to accept this as a personality flaw that you have!  One of the things that I love about you the most is your passion.  Your passion for life, music, poetry, art, people, the gospel, :) and me.  (I left out food and sleep.)  You are full of passion!  Don't take Bruce's critiquing too personal.  We know you are a passionate person because of how many people love you in your life.  I love who you are, and your friends love who you are.  Don't be frustrated about music.  Ask for help.  Ask God first, then Bruce.  Don't take his advice personally though, and know that your man always loves you.  I'm so proud of you and all you do!"

Now a quote from my new favorite soundtrack, "The Last 5 Years"-

"Have I mentioned today... how lucky I am... to be in love with you?"

About Passion...

So as you know (if you read the last post), I've been doing a lot of thinking about passion lately.  Particularly how to channel my inner passion into my music by channeling it into my daily life.  

Ishtar, my hot Puerto Rican violinist friend, says that all I need to do is think about sex.  Probably not the best idea for me right now, Ishy!  Yikes.  

Pianist friend ashley helped me muster up some strong inner feelings and then after forcing me to play in my emotional state, boosted my ego by telling me I sound like Jackie Du Pre. 

I've been trying to feel emotions stronger, be more happy, get more angry, be more dedicated.  

I guess I didn't realize the negative results this experiment might have on my life.  More depressed?  More lonely?  Extremely homesick for my missionary?  In exploring my suppressed emotions, I've found some very deep ones that in my opinion, are best left alone!   

Yesterday was a dark and dismal day.  Emotional... yes.  Passionate... yes.  Productive practice, and incredible cello sound... yes!!  But seriously, I can't function on such a constant stream of passion and high emotion.  Not like that.  

Thus the need for further self revision:

Earlier to bed and earlier to rise.  I'm seeking health, wealth, wisdom, and BALANCE.  I'm still channeling passion.  But hopefully with healthier sleep habits, I'll have better coping skills.  

I'm wearing my new pumpkin-color sweater and bright yellow rain boots.  I woke up at 7 am with 8 hours of wonderful sleep.  I'm feeling strongly optimistic and ready for a fresh start.  

The Michigan leaves have chosen today as the day to change color.  The world is a beautiful place!  This is something to be passionate about.