Ishtar, my hot Puerto Rican violinist friend, says that all I need to do is think about sex. Probably not the best idea for me right now, Ishy! Yikes.
Pianist friend ashley helped me muster up some strong inner feelings and then after forcing me to play in my emotional state, boosted my ego by telling me I sound like Jackie Du Pre.
I've been trying to feel emotions stronger, be more happy, get more angry, be more dedicated.
I guess I didn't realize the negative results this experiment might have on my life. More depressed? More lonely? Extremely homesick for my missionary? In exploring my suppressed emotions, I've found some very deep ones that in my opinion, are best left alone!
Yesterday was a dark and dismal day. Emotional... yes. Passionate... yes. Productive practice, and incredible cello sound... yes!! But seriously, I can't function on such a constant stream of passion and high emotion. Not like that.
Thus the need for further self revision:
Earlier to bed and earlier to rise. I'm seeking health, wealth, wisdom, and BALANCE. I'm still channeling passion. But hopefully with healthier sleep habits, I'll have better coping skills.
I'm wearing my new pumpkin-color sweater and bright yellow rain boots. I woke up at 7 am with 8 hours of wonderful sleep. I'm feeling strongly optimistic and ready for a fresh start.
The Michigan leaves have chosen today as the day to change color. The world is a beautiful place! This is something to be passionate about.
2 comments:
Interesting thoughts. I find myself trying to strike that balance between passion and normalcy often. Also, thanks again for your wonderful lesson in Relief Society! Immediately upon meeting you, I had the distinct impression to call you as a teacher. The Spirit has told me that your life experiences, personality, and testimony of the gospel will help our sisters in the branch learn about the Savior and become more like Him.
Jamilyn, you seem to be really taking risks and make sacrifices for your music, and that's a great example to me. I really like how you can wake up so early, and that you always try to look at things in a good perspective. I definitely understand how you feel about leaving some emotions alone. I'm glad you seem to be finding passion in the good things in life too. After realizing how hard things can be, we appreciate the good things more. Whenever you miss your missionary, I'm here! I noticed you were looking quite adorable today. love ya!
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